Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Spring itch

Saint Valentine’s Day is the first of those holy/planting days, the next two being Saint Patrick’s Day and Good Friday. Saint Patty’s Day and Good Friday are both early potato planting days and Saint Valentine’s Day is the beginning of planting those really early garden seeds such as lettuce, spinach, peas, and maybe radishes, in other words the salad garden. So as I began to think of gardening again (did you think I would be thinking of LUV on V-Day?),I drove my little Nissan pickup into town to the leaf dump. I wanted to make sure I got some of the leaf compost before some farmer hauled it off for his fields. In the fall the town picks up and shreds the leaves and by spring they are starting to look like peat moss. In my opinion a leaf dump is a good recycling project for any community, turning refuse into something valuable with a minimum of effort. Have you seen what they charge for peat in the garden stores? Hopefully the leaf humus will be an excellent soil amendment. I’ve gotten six pickup loads in piles around the garden. I refrained from putting it directly on the garden area because I wanted to give the cover crop of ryegrass a chance to put down deep roots and grow. My cover crop really looks anemic this year but then so do the local farmers’ rye cover crops. Worst I’ve seen in 30 years.

I knew my wife would also want a load of leaf mulch for her flower gardens, so I brought her one. When she saw her pile that evening she put on her smile and got all doe-eyed and told me she wanted MORE! I tried to beg off by saying I was broke and my truck was very low on fuel. That evening a ten and a five magically appeared on my dresser top. So I brought her another load but she still wants MORE. That woman sure does love her flowers!

It is obvious from the above comments that my wife and I are getting the spring gardening itch. Once I get all those shredded leaves turned into the soil along with the ryegrass maybe the garden will be off to a good start this year. At very least I got my exercise quota from pitch forking those pickup loads. Now I need to get those salad seeds planted (when it stops raining.)

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Porkerville

I got put on the VA fat farm. The VA doesn’t call it a fat farm; they call it their “MOVE” program which stands for I don’t know what but I get the message. At my last check-up at the Veteran’s Clinic the doctor asked me my height and used that with what the nurse had just weighed me at to figure my body mass index or BMI. He looked at me kind of strange, asked my height a second time and then refigured my BMI a second time. “You don’t look that heavy” he said. Of course all of this convinced me that I had just worn too many winter clothes for my weigh-in and more importantly had developed really heavy bones from all that skim milk I had drunk over the years. Still I look at this free VA program as a real opportunity for me since I am sure I’ll feel much better at 180 than at 220.

I am sharing this boring personal aspect of my life because I am certain there are others who may have the same problem and may want to see how I progress and what the program is about. Besides, it is still a while until gardening and fishing season and if I post anymore of my personal philosophies it will be even more boring.

I am aware that a sort of perfect storm has formed, a downward spiral. First came the high-calorie holidays, then being more sedentary in winter on top of being less active in retirement. Even in summer when there is a lot of yard and garden work, I only put in half a day compared to the 12-hour days of physical labor before I retired. I have also been blessed with the curse (or is it cursed with the blessing?) of a great cook for a wife. If after nearly 40 years of marriage that is the worst I can say about her I guess I’m a lucky man. (I put that in there just in case you-know-who reads this.) Still, if I had been forced to live off my own unpalatable cooking all these years I am certain I would be leaner. Taken together, all these elements of this brewing perfect storm along with my age, I do need to be careful.

I was impressed with our first MOVE meeting with a registered dietician. The goal is simple: lose 10% of your weight in 6 months at the rate of about one pound per week. The method is simple: rid yourself of 500 calories per day, 250 calories burned from increased physical activity (we were each issued pedometers to wear) and 250 calories reduced in food consumption calories. A 250 calorie reduction in a 2000+ daily caloric consumption does not seem that tough. The plan attacks the calorie reduction at the margin, i.e. you give up the easiest 250 calories not the hardest. Butter and tub spreads are extremely calorie-dense, about 50 calories per tablespoon; there are spray-on butter substitutes in the dairy section which taste just like butter but are zero calories per serving;losing a single slice of bread can mean a reduction of 100 calories. So cutting calories at the margin by replacing spreads with the spray-on, replacing sugar in my coffee and tea with zero-calorie Splenda and cutting back one slice of bread and one cup of milk, I should be able to lose that 250 calories per day and not even feel any sacrifice. (Sacrifice is the part we all hate.) Replacing one of my daily cups of skim milk with a diet soft drink might even feel like a treat and would save me 80 calories. So cutting 250 calories a day seems very doable. It is much more a matter of awareness than of sacrifice. I think the real question is whether the 250 calorie per day reduction and 250 calorie extra activity burn will actually translate into a pound loss per week. That remains to be seen.

The day of our Move meeting I had planned to take my wife out for a pizza supper. It dawned on me that I would not have to forego this date night. If I just ordered a diet drink instead of my usual sweet tea and free refill then I would save a couple hundred calories. Ditto if we ordered thin crust instead of thick crust. Ditto if we ordered veggie lover instead of sausage or pepperoni. The only part of the MOVE deal I agreed to was cutting what I normally ate by 250 calories and we did that and still had our date night too.

As for the burning an extra 250 calories per day by becoming less sedentary and engaging in more walking, let me say we went shopping the day after the MOVE meeting. Let me also say that unlike my wife, I hate shopping and usually sit in the car working a crossword puzzle to “improve my memory” while she pokes around shopping. I decided to mentally change my viewpoint of chain stores to see them as free-heated walking venues. Instead of plodding along shoving the grocery cart and acting as the "guardian of the purse" while my wife read all the labels on all the cans in the store, I took off at a good pace looking for the emptiest store aisles to serve as my walking track and put some steps on my VA-issued pedometer. Again this may be more a matter of awareness and changed attitude than sacrifice. Time and pounds-lost will tell.
Stay tuned for Porkerville updates.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

What’s Happenin’

You know you are getting old when you fall asleep during the Super Bowl and your wife has to explain to you what happened in the second half; that and the fact that you remember a lot more of the names of the players on the first Super Bowl championship team than today’s Green Bay team. But what the heck I did get a good nap out of it.

I haven’t blogged much in January because I set aside the month for putting up a tile ceiling over our wavy, uneven, unsquare bedroom ceiling (one of the joys of living in an old farm house built by old farmers not carpenters). How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb? Just one but it’s going to take him all day to do it. That is why I set a whole month aside for this simple project. That and the fact that those farmers used hard oak instead of pine for all their studs and ceiling joists and every nail I drove bent beneath my hammer and expletives.

There is a country song that is popular just now about a man who hears voices in his head, the advice of his parents and grandparents which the wisdom of his own passing years has proven to be valuable and true. When I begin a project like the ceiling or even a task as simple as washing the dishes or simple house chores, I rely on the voices of old sayings, proverbs and platitudes to get past the initial inertia of an evil living room sofa calling my name for a nap and telling me to procrastinate another hour or day.

To get me started there is the old Chinese saying that “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”. I ask myself what is the first simple step I need to take to begin. (No! not lie down on the couch and think about it!) Other initiating advice is “Well begun is well half done” and “On the plains of hesitation lay the bones of countless millions” and “Carpe diem”. I find the advice of Julius Caesar especially valuable as a modus operandi in accomplishing any project: “Divide and conquer.” I think he was speaking more to Gauls and Teutons but the adage works well for any unpleasant chore or “insurmountable” problem. It is the basis for my problem solving. Divide the whole problem or project into parts and then break the parts into still smaller parts and those into even smaller parts until eventually you reach a part so microscopic you automatically assert “Hey, I can do that.” Sometimes (most often actually) I can only begin the dishes with “putting the silverware away.” If all other motivators fail there is always my wife quoting from St. Paul’s epistle that “Those who don’t work, don’t eat.”

For my next project I have set aside the whole month of February for doing my taxes. No need to get in a rush; after all I am retired.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

poverty or POVERTY


Am I poor? I really don’t know the answer to that question. I don’t feel poor. All my needs are met. Perhaps poverty like beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There are different kinds of poverty. There is the stereotypical hillbilly poverty with a front porch full of old appliances and a front yard full of partially dismantled cars and beer bottles. There is the stereotypical ghetto poverty where kids fight over who has the correct NBA jacket and expensive sneakers endorsed by the right sports celebrity. There is the sense of entitlement poverty where people wonder why the government is slow “getting me my money” and “my benefits”. There is the Benedictine/ Buddhist poverty where men and women purposely take a vow of poverty to live a simple life. There are the back-to-the-earth/self-sufficiency types who also want to return to the simple life and opt out of the rat race. There are those who just feel that most of the economy-produced products are so much clutter in their lives and garages. Poverty can lead to simplicity and simplicity to order and order to happiness. A degree of self-sufficiency can lead to a sense of security and security to happiness.

Of course there is the government established poverty level of income to decide if one is poor or not. But this “poverty line” income is constant across the country and the cost of living varies greatly depending on the location, even from one county to the next. I had a conversation with a widow this summer who complained about paying thousands of dollars in land taxes. Judging from our conversation, her property was quite similar to what I owned. Her property is near the county I live in. “You need to move across that county line,” I said. I only pay a couple hundred a year.

Then there is the concept of land versus income as an indicator of wealth. Remember land is that stuff that they quit making. The small acreage that I own in the country would make me a wealthy land owner in Rwanda, Haiti, China, Japan or any number of other places on the face of the earth. Are people with higher incomes who live in a big city on a dab of land richer than me? Who knows? If I want anything a city or town has to offer, I just drive in and get it. I am not trying to brainwash anyone or proselytize, but if someone has adequate health care, then the simple back-to-basics lifestyle has much to be recommended for it.

I need to cut this short. I want to go out to the garage and see if there is anymore junk I can get rid of. Simplify…simplify…simplify.